My mama told me that when someone touches your life, you should always write down the memories and feelings, because the feelings never go away,they just simply get pushed to the side by events in our lives. Let me tell ya about someone who's touched my life tremendously. I met him in October, DAYS before my 18th birthday when him and his friends pulled up to me and my friends while ordering in the drive thru at you guessed it... Filibertos. I didn't really get to know him until December, but that doesnt mean he taught me any less than he should have. Looking back at my senior year, i couldn't picture it without this fella. Memories with him are countless and he truely became a great comfort to me and an answer to my prayers without him even realizing. My brothers are honestly my life, and since my dad isn't the greatest influence on them and in our lives much, i kept praying someone would come into their lives to teach them how they need to prepare for a mission. At the same time, this guy was preparing for his mission, and couldnt have been a better examplar tthem through his courage, strength, independence, faith, and love for others.
One way he personally helped me was showing me that i deserve more than some rotten scum bag. I've always struggled trusting guys, ever since my dad. I figured all guys were the same. They'll suck you in, get you to trust them and love them, then walk away. He was different. I never struggled trusting him, which was weird.. He was someone i knew i could rely on, and someone i knew was sincere in all things he did in his life. Heavenly Father knew just what i needed in my life at the time we crossed paths. He knew i needed someone to prepare me for my future companion. He knew i needed someone to teach me that i can trust. Most of all, he knew i needed someone to raise the bar for whoever i marry, and that i shouldnt settle for anyone less than what i saw in who the Lord sent to teach me.
I think my favorite quality about him is his sweet ability to love, and have people love him back. His love is purely a Christlike love and nothing less. I remember Valentines Day, we went out to dinner, and he said something to me that'll never leave my heart... "Whenever i'm having a hard day, i like to think of Dallan, or just go sit with him. He has the toughest trial, but he's so happy and content with little things and loves life." I basically wanted to fall in love right then and there, cause if you know me, you know Dallan Jacob has my whole heart and for anyone to appreciate Dallan as much as i do... well lets just say it brings me to tears.
Another thing he has taught me is that i need to love the people i serve, no matter how rude, ungrateful, gross, weird, different, or selfish someone is ESPECIALLY on the days where the last thing i want to do is serve someone else. Recently, I could always tell the days when he had been out serving. He was just genuinely happier. Simple as that.
Last night was bitter sweet saying bye to him. He'll always be a great friend to me, and someone i admire. I can't even imagine the growth he's going to have as he goes and serves the Lord's people on his mission and i dont doubt he already loves the people there. I am SO grateful to have had a friend like him in my life, and feel SO blessed to see the reasons why he was placed in my life, at this very time.
I think the most important lesson he's helped me learn is to be grateful. Grateful for trials, grateful for friendships, grateful for family, and most important, grateful for opportunities to grow from the people in our paths and be blessed.
“A friend is one with whom you are comfortable, to whom you are loyal, through whom you are blessed, and for whom you are grateful.” -Arthur Ward
April 2 is a day thats left prints in my soul. Not only because yes, it was conference and who doesn't love being spiritualy uplifted, but because it was the start to a very long, and ongoing journey. On April 18th, i was admitted into the hospital and left 5 days later with no answers. Countless prayers came my way, and trust me, i felt them all by how much peace i had felt through each test i pursued. I was miserable, but yet at the same time felt so much peace and love, and knew everything was alright. I kept asking myself, what do i need to learn from this? Why am i going through yet another difficult trial? Sureee your all thinking come on chels.. Throwing up whatever you eat is definately great for loosing weight but trust me on this one ladies. it. gets. old. Needless to say, after 5 weeks of no answers, and 4 doctors saying they think its a psychological issue i got pretty discouraged and lost sight of hope for the future. What ifs started rolling around. What if i can't graduate because i'm missing so much school. What if i can't go to BYU this summer for the time of my life. What if i do go to BYU this summer and throw up every 5 seconds in class. What if i am crazy and it is in my head. We decided to try one last test on my gall bladder before giving up and claiming i have mental issues and monday bright and early i went in for a pretty lengthy test. My tech guy kept telling me "Chels, i can tell your a tough girl. But this last test is going to be a rough one. I'm talking child birth and kidney stones rough. You're going to want to curl up in a ball, but its super important to hold still. You're going to feel nauseated beyond belief, but i promise it'll only last ten minutes." Prayers are a beautiful thing at a time like this, let me tell ya. After it was over, i went straight to school. During seminary, my teacher asked me how the results were and i told him i wouldnt know for another 2 hours. Not ten seconds later did i get a text from my beautiful mother, saying "Your test was abnormal! It's your gall bladder!" Relief burned my soul. Did i really just get my answer? I'm really not crazy? I looked over at my teacher with tears in my eyes, SO grateful for this trial, and SO grateful for an answer. And of course being a girl i spent the next hour crying tears of happiness, with the fullest heart possible. I got a blessing that night from the dad i claim, Gregg Scoresby. He blessed me with the most beautiful things and left me knowing the lesson i needed to learn. Patience. Through trials, we obtain patience. "For you have need of steadfast patience and endurance, so that you may perform and fully accomplish the will of God, and thus receive and carry away [and enjoy to the full] what is promised". Hebrews 10: 36. I know the Lord will bless me because of the patience i've had to bear. I know patience is greatly needed in my life. I don't know how my life will be in twenty years, but i know through this trial he will bless me with something that will require the patience i have obtained through this fork in my road. I still have to face surgery and the struggles that it'll bring physically and emotionally, but i mean come on. I have rods in my back remember? This is nothing i can't handle. Life is beautiful guys. Remember that.
